The Skinny on Sex and Marijuana

By Lauren Katulka

Marijuana might be illegal in most U.S. states, but that hasn’t stopped roughly 30 million of us toking up in the last year. Whether you’re a regular user or you just like a puff at a party, pot can potentially impact every facet of your life, including your sex life. So do sex and pot really mix? The jury is still out.

What the Science Says

Since marijuana lowers inhibitions, scientists have linked marijuana use with high-risk sexual activity and the spread of sexually transmitted infections. They claim people using pot are less likely to use condoms. They might also agree to sex and sexual acts they wouldn’t normally consent to.

Scientists also say prolonged marijuana use can halve testosterone levels. That dramatic reduction is enough for people of both genders to lose their libidos.

What Pot Users Say

Some marijuana users say they’ve had the best sex of their lives on the drug. They credit pot with making them feel more open and connected with their partners. Sensations are heightened and since marijuana can distort perceptions of time, arousal and orgasms can seem to go on forever. These people also contradict the science and say marijuana acts as an aphrodisiac for them.

However, others say they struggle to focus while they’re under the influence. They feel more distracted and distant during sex on pot.

There’s also a third camp who claim using marijuana has no impact on their sex lives whatsoever. Whether they’re under the influence or straight, sex is pretty much the same.

We all react differently to drugs, including pot. Someone you know might have mind-blowing sex under the influence while your own experience is ho-hum. There are also the short- and long-term effects of marijuana on the body to think about. Keep all that in mind when you partake.

Death of the Love Letter

Guest Post by Dawn Howell.

You know what I miss? Love letters! “What’s that?!” you ask? Love letters, real letters that you actually hold in your hand, are how our great-great grandparents used to share their heart and soul with each other. When was the last time you saw one? Do they still exist? Sometimes, I wonder, “Did they ever? Were they just a figment of my imagination?”

Guys, please, please, hear me. If you want to get a leg up on the competition, invest in a good writing pen and some stationary. At this point, I would even settle for pencil on notebook paper. And, God, please don’t ask me what a pencil is.

Honestly, love letters are romantic gold. They are an incredible way to show us ladies that creative, beautiful mind of yours. In this fast paced, instant access, “push button-click-done” era that we live in, it’s an incredible compliment for a man to dedicate a part of his day to genuinely and honestly put into words how he feels about me.

Unfortunately, this iconic token of affection is on its way to the romance graveyard. It’s so sad, too. Not only do love letters give us a peak into your heart, they also give us something reach back to when we’re trying to understand who you are. Sure, you could send me a cute text with fancy emoticons. But, I would much rather have something that I can hold in my hand, treasure, and know is your truth.

I don’t even expect love letters anymore. The sad thing is, not too many other women are, either. Put some time into allowing a glimpse of how you see me in your world. Keep this dying art alive for a little bit longer. Don’t worry. You don’t have to be Shakespeare. You just have to be you.

You Get Her. You Got Her.

Your girlfriend is driving you nuts, you’re attracted to a chick who treats you like crap, you’re in a soul sucking relationship… Read on.

Women are not easy. Hard fact: the sexes are wired differently.  I can’t tell you how many times I was dating a nice guy who had potential to be a great boyfriend but he just didn’t get it. Did you know a male baby goes through a chemical wash in the mother’s womb? This means you have partial destruction of fibers connecting the left and right sides of your brain. Because of this boys have unilateral thinking, while girls have bi-lateral. There’s nothing wrong with that, it just makes men and women different in how we think.

 

My first thought is: do not try to understand us. My second thought is: I have 5 tips for you.

 

1.We act on emotion. When we say “ leave me alone!” We don’t always mean it. What we say is not always what we feel. This is because our brains are processing both emotional and logical cues. We may say leave me alone because that makes logical sense, but we’re still processing the emotional side. Men will usually respond with either logic or emotion and the other will come along eventually. We’re processing both at the same time and sometimes we need a minute to get our actual, honest reaction out.

2. We have a very good memory. Be careful of what you say or do, because it will come back to haunt you. We remember details about all kinds of shit that you’ve long forgotten — both the good and the bad. Letting go is not easy for us. If you don’t understand, at least try. You get huge points for making an honest effort — and we’ll remember it!

3. Trust will get you beyond the bases. If a chick trusts you, she will be yours. Some women don’t trust due to their past. If your gal has trust issues, communicate with her. Ease her fears. Women like to talk. Guys like to walk. Learn how to talk the walk.

4. Watch some chick flicks, listen to how girls interact with each other. Learn to read women. You will start seeing patterns and understand what makes us laugh, what makes us cry, what turns us and off. Screenplay writers have a great sense of grasping what’s real.

5. Pick up a women’s magazine like Cosmo. Glance through the articles and the questions girls ask. This is a great way to get some insight into how we really think.

What Is It About Guys with Tats?

Last night I had a G2G ( girl to girl)  text exchange with my bestie Elaine. Elaine is my muse and works closely with me on Girls Unedited – she’s pretty much amazing !

L: I was looking at your Instagram, I didn’t know you were into guys with tats.

E: Yeah, I love tattoos. My friend, Brigid, got me into this Canadian body builder with tattoos over half his body.

L: Do you have any tats?

E: Yeah, I have music symbols on my hips.

L: (laughing) Do they play music when you have sex?

E: (laughing) No, but that might be fun. Do you have any tattoos?

L: Yeah, I have a tribal symbol of wings on my lower back. I’m waiting for them to get clipped so I can settle down.

E: (laughs)

L:  You like tattoos on guys?

E: Yes. I have a nerdy reason and a sexy reason.

L: What’s your nerdy reason?

E: I like the stories behind them.

L:  I agree, the symbolism can be really cool.

E: Yeah, and some of the stories are crazy.

L: What’s your sexy reason?

E: Well, when someone finds a good tattoo artist who understands how muscles move on a body and they place the tattoo just so, that’s really hot.

L: I just love it when you can see a guys tat peak out from under his shirt.

E: Yes! Makes you think.

L:  Right. It makes you wonder if they’re a bad boy or a just little edgy.  Look at Beckham. He is covered and super hot.  Not all guys could pull that off.

E: He really does pull it off. Soccer players are kind of notorious for their tats.

L: Where’s your favorite place on a guy for a tattoo?

E: I really like chest tattoos.

L: I like shoulder blades and on the arm. If a guy has a good chest, that can be pretty sexy.

E: What’s your favorite tattoo?

L: I like different variations of tribal tattoos.

Hell YES!  I’m a sucker for a guy with a Tattoo.  When I decided to write this blog I had deja vu  about a guy I met with a great tattoo.  At the time I was living in Venice Beach, Ca.  I was at the ATM on Windward Ave. when I saw a hot guy about 6’2″, olive skin, dark shoulder length hair, athletic body, sweats and a distressed jean shirt walking toward me.

First thing I notice is a sexy tribal tat peaking out from under his shirt. He came over to me, introduced himself and said he thought I was cute and asked if I lived close by.  John was visiting from Tasmania, staying at the hostel across the street. He had a rockin’ accent and was super charming.  After 15 minutes of talking, he asked me if I would mind if he showered at my apartment.

Shower? I was like “OMG, shower?  As in water, naked?”

“I don’t even know you.”

He replied in a very soft sensuous voice, ” Yes you do, you like me.” (He was spot on with that, he was very cute.)

“The showers are horrible at the hostel, can I come over?” he asked.  Out of the norm, I decided “why not!” In Kabbalah they say “Go out of your box.” I’ve never done anything like this.  I figured, I’ll try almost anything once.  As the story goes, we ended up in a great relationship for almost a year until he moved back home. To this day, I can still remember his tattoo and it’s enigma that pulled me in to want to get to know this stranger better.

Tattoos may not equal sex appeal to some conservatives or Jews, but I think the general consensus seems to be that tattoos do in fact enhance a guy’s sex appeal, within reason.  Face and full body tattoo’s fall outside of this idea. I asked the girls of Girls Unedited what goes on in their head when they see a guy with a tat, the comments I got were :

“this guy isn’t afraid to walk on the wild side”

” he must be good in bed”

“shows he’s not afraid of pain”

“he’s passionate and not afraid to show it”

“he probably has a bad boy side – that’s hot”

“mysterious, I want to know his story”

“he must have a big d**k, he had the balls to get a tat”

Based on the girls’ comments I think a great nickname for a guy’s tat is a “stud stamp.” Much better then the girls “tramp stamp.”

“My body is my journal and my tattoo is my story.”
-Johnny Depp

If you’re thinking about inking, do your research!

  • Don’t  bargain shop for your artist – A talented artist is not cheap – nor should they be. Check out different shops, get references, read yelp reviews, have him or her do sketches for you, make sure hygiene is a top priority. No garage tattoos! Go to a reputable shop.
  • Design – do your homework.  Think twice about doing your girlfriend’s name, a naked chick, a “MOM” tat…. it’s really not a turn on to see another girl’s sketch or name on a guy’s arm.  And “Mom” should probably stay on greeting cards, it’s just not very sexy.  Your art represents you.  Removals are not fun or cheap.  Sleep on it!

Welcome!

I know what it’s like. I know how it feels to look around and feel like everyone else is meeting the perfect match, and finding happiness with their partner.

But I also know what it’s like to be successful in love. I know from experience what it takes to build a successful long-term relationship from the first date to the end of the road. I’ve done it myself!

I want to welcome you to Girls Unedited. I’m Lorraine. I’ve also been on a lot (a LOT) of first dates. And I’ve been on a lot fewer second dates.

Over the years, I’ve always been the “go to girl” for my friends (men and women) whenever they needed dating advice. There’s one thing that’s always been obvious: Most men don’t know what women want. Well good news – Girls Unedited is here to show you.

My bevy of beautiful bloggers and I are going to share candid love, sex, and dating advice from women, for men. You guys get access to the secret world of women – the stuff we only talk about with each other. I believe that once you see – unfiltered and uncensored – what women talk about, what they want, and what their dreams and fantasies are, then you will have what you need to find the relationship you want, with the woman of your dreams. Every guy deserves a great woman. I’m here to help you find her!

Happy Valentine’s!

After months of writing and a year of planning, Girls Unedited is finally LIVE! Yeah!  Learning how to use WordPress site is definitely going to be technically challenging for me but my wonderful partner Elaine has insisted that it’s as easy as Facebook.  So, please bare with our growing pains.  Its going to be a fun ride!

Valentine’s Day. What does this day mean?

For some it’s a special day they can spend with their partner, for others it’s a day they dread because they’re in a bad relationship. For most singles it’s the Hallmark holiday they try to avoid

If you’re spending today alone, take the time to do something nice for yourself.  We all need some self love.  Buy a new shirt, get a massage, make yourself a nice dinner. Whatever it is you enjoy – go for it!

If you don’t love yourself, it’s going to be hard to love someone else.  Take a few minutes to think about what you want and set a goal for next Valentine’s Day. We have all year to help you be the man women want.

If there’s a girl you’re interested in or you have a good friend who is a girl, there’s nothing wrong with sending a  text saying “Happy Valentine’s Day.”  Whether it’s a birthday, Mothers Day, Thanksgiving, the 4th of July or in this case, Valentine’s Day, it’s a great opportunity to let someone know that you’re thinking about them.  Remember, out of site, out of mind.