Is your profile sabotaging your dating life?

You think your profile sounds witty and every girl wants to know you. WELL… YOU MAY BE WRONG!

You might be turning girls off not on. Why? Because 99% of the time, men think differently than women. Don’t worry though, that’s why we’re here.

The following is an email I received last week:
“Hi Lorraine, I heard about you through a friend. I’m hoping you can help me. I’m practically getting no replies on any of my online dating profiles. I don’t understand what I’m doing wrong. Can you please help me?

After receiving this email, I asked him to send me his profile along with the photo he’s using. Here’s his profile:

Quick-witted and caring, give more than I look to receive but really appreciate effort no matter how small. Looking for someone to travel near and far with while leaving a trail of change in our wake. I don’t use the word bro, even around my bros or my actual bro. I don’t have a photo album full of selfies, it’s full of places I’ve been and the cutest niece and nephews I’ve seen. I’m past the club stage and more into good restaurants and better conversation. Just need someone to toast with.

Give more than I look to receive but really appreciate effort no matter how small
What I hear from this is that you are so hard up you really don’t care how a girl treats you – sounds very insecure.

Near and far – leaving a trail of change in our wake
Near and far is not very descriptive – you can make this more fun.
Leaving a trail of change in our wake – the first thing I think of when I hear wake is looking over a dead person’s body. lol

“I don’t use the word bros……selfies….cutest niece and nephews”
Don’t criticize! Let’s not talk about what other people do that you don’t like – stick to listing the positives about you. The niece and nephew part is fine, but it can be reworded so you appeal to single moms with kids or girls who want kids (if you’re okay with that).

“Better conversation”
We can find a better choice of words.

“Just need someone to toast with”
There is the word “ NEED” again- no girl wants a needy guy.

My POV: Brian’s profile makes him sound desperate and he’s selling himself short. If he comes across as having low expectations, how is he going to find a true partner?

Here’s what I said: I don’t know you, but your friend told me a little about you. She said that you have been on several safaris and photograph wild animals as a hobby. You love going out to eat! My kinda man! Animals and Food. Two characteristics most girls love. You did NOT mention either in your profile.

Your profile picture is poorly lit, and sitting on the living room floor? It’s uninteresting and not flattering. You’re a photographer, you should know better. Why not a photo shot of you during your safari vacation? That would be HOT!

Here is the new profile I wrote for Brian:

I’m quick witted, caring and FUN! I’m as comfortable in a button down shirt as I am in jeans and a tee. I have a passion for traveling and fine dining. My favorite hobby is photographing wildlife in exotic locations. Yes, I love kids and dogs too! Looking for a woman who would enjoy laughing on a park bench just as much as she would having a candlelit dinner for two.

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